Dutch East India 1688

[high_school_bassoonist]

ok, this is a piece of program music ive been writing for classical Orchestra. its a three movement tone poem, which consists of
1 - Adagio
2 - Allegro
3 - ????? - not sure what it really is??!?!?

.. not entirely finished persae, but i dont know where to go from where it currently is, (i dont wish to add another movement) i just need more of an outside editing job to be performed on it.

The images i was looking for are as follows

1st movement, sinister pirates in deep water (still on the boat of course!!) the base line of this should hopefully provide a rocking sort of sensation/feel to the listener. half way through when the movement speeds up to double time, this is to represent a crew-mate walking the plank.

2nd movement. A ship of the dutch east india company, with a joyous major feel. the first section is to represent the crew members singing as they work. then later (after the captain comes on deck (captain=trumpet)) we hear a call and answer from the captain to the crew-mates.

3rd movement, This is to represent the chase and battle between the two vessels. (i'll let you guess who wins). enjoy, and any feedback would be wonderful. thankyou.

[Boneman]

Hi HSB!

A question for you. Is this piece for performance or just a paper study?

[high_school_bassoonist]

hey boneman. At the moment its just a paper study, for i dont know of any orchestras (yet) that i could get to play it, so the only way it would be for performance is if i could re-arrange it for concert band format.

[Boneman]

Be sure about your players HSB (nice pint you know?!) there are some scary bits

[reith]

Not sure if I should be reviewing this now - things are a bit distracted here. Still, let's have a go.

First movement. Catches the atmosphere. The clean open texture is fine. (Nice pedal bass) Not too happy with the Basses alone in bar 49. It's a fairly foundation tone and doubling it at the octave with quiet cellos (or a single desk of cellos) might give a better sense of intonation in real life.
More might be made of the climax - thickening the scoring (sustained horn (or all the brass) notes - don't have to be loud). And filling out the trem strings in bar 56.
Just a thought - you're asking for 4 timps - that may reduce the chance of performance - orchestras can get the extra drum (or more - I think the Rite of Spring uses 5 timps) but provincial orchestras only have 2 or 3.
Finally, ending on the D came as a sort-of cop-out. Is it worth thinking about a sustained, loud, deep E in bar 59, possibly with a timp roll?

I reckon this would sound good performed live with a few changes in the scoring - thickening the texture slightly - horns/clarinets - quiet, sustained, they can fill out the harmony a bit - but won't work too well on Sibelius unless you can get a sotto voce pp or p and minimal attack.

Second movement:
Nice and lively. About the right length with this material. Effective scoring of unison in the tutti. Good voicing of the instruments. Little to say about this one.

I haven't time to get into detail about the third movement right now - will try later. Again good voicing. But I think you can expand it a bit - that opening rhythm, start it quietly and build it up to a helluva noise, (as in Sensemaya, for instance!)

Hope you don't mind these suggestions.

Reith

Editing: The last movement comes over as a sort of danza or ritual dance. To me, the volume needs to build up over the whole piece - extend it somewhat and develop a theme that can ride over the rhythm at the climax, still thundering away beneath. It would have to be a tense sort of tune - in its first utterances, starting quietly, possibly deep in the bass.
There are example which you don't have to follow by any means but they're there: Revueltas' famous Sensemaya (in 7/4 througout); Paul Creston's Invocation and Dance....even Ravel's Bolero for building up the climax. But these are just opinions and - you're the composer so it's your call!

Good luck.